I’m here to tell you a home truth: You do not have to be friends with your ex. Look, I get it, I really do: After a break up, it is so, so tempting to try to be friends with the person you were dating. You might feel this way for a lot of reasons. Regardless of whether you were the dump-er or the dump-ee, the idea of suddenly going from seeing someone all the time to not seeing him or her at all is simply unimaginable. Or maybe you were friends before you dated, so you feel like you should be able to go back to that. Or you think that, if you could just hang out once in a while, the break-up wouldn’t feel quite so
terrible. Or maybe your ex is going through a rough time, so you feel like you should be supportive. But, regardless of your motivation, sometimes being friends with an ex simply isn’t possible, and trying to force that relationship to happen can make the break up worse, creating more bitterness and anger and keeping you from truly moving on.
So here are 10 reasons not to be friends with your ex
Of all the many reasons not to stay friends with an ex, Abusive has to come first, if your ex is either physically or emotionally abusive is good enough reason to stay away from sure person. Don’t hope that they would, even if they do, would you really want to take the risk?
2. Its torture
Your ex might not be the Abusive type but really if you guys stay as friends and hanging out, then s/he does something funny that made you smile, you suddenly want to kiss him/her, but cant. So tell me why put yourself through sure torture when you can just simply move on with your life.
3. Moving On
Moving on after a break up is somewhat difficult especially when youve invest alot in such relationship. So ordinarily the hope of you ex coming back makes you want to hold on to them in whatever form. However, moving on after a bad break up requires you not to be friends with your #ex so that you chase off potential dates. Truly severing contact is the kindest thing to do here.
4. Respect for your new partner
Nobody should dictate who you are friends with. If you're genuinely friends with your ex then it's fair enough to stay in contact, even if you have a new partner. But their feelings should always be respected. If a new partner is uncomfortable with you maintaining contact, it may be the best thing to stop.
5. You can’t undo the past.
There are some memories you must have obviously shared with your ex that would probably hurt you when you are with him/her, realizing that you might not get to share such memories again.
If you’ve seen each other naked, the desire to want to cosy up to your ex would arise especially of you the receiving partner.
There are too many nicknames, inside jokes and memories to start fresh, so you’re likely to fall into old dating patterns even when not romantically involved. It can be confusing for one or both of you. Note: Most platonic pals of opposite genders have not seen each other naked.
6. Friends with benefits
If two adults want this kind of arrangement, then that's up to them. However, it can be problematical with ex-partners. One may well agree to this situation in the hope that the other will realise they should be together, when the chances are that they're just looking for easy s-ex.
7. Ending addiction
Have you broken up and got back with your #ex countless times? If so, it may be time to put an end to this. Being hooked on a person isn't healthy, and how many times can you try again? However much it hurts, end contact once and for all. It isn't a friendship, and it's not doing you any good.
10. It’s not healthy.
You’ve had your heart broken. Why not invest your time and energy in the people who make you happy, not the ones who’ve hurt you deeply? (And if you broke up because of betrayal, character issues, hurtful comments or incompatible values, why are you choosing to spend time with someone you’ve already learned isn’t good for you?)
It would be wonderful if you can salvage a friendship from a broken relationship, but in most cases that is not common. Emotions are too much of a factor, and it can be a big issue. Have you managed to stay friends with your ex, and how do your current partners feel about it? What do you think about being friends with an ex? Possible...or not probable share your opinion?